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There, I found it. Oppenheimer's letters from 1922 to 1945 were published in "Robert Oppenheimer: Letters and Recollections". I skipped around a bit. It was interesting enough, but I'll quote one Amazon review from reader Stephen M. St. Onge:

"J. Robert Oppenheimer was better at keeping himself hidden than most people, and you won't learn a lot about him from these letters, but it does a give a rare, patial glimpse of a very mysterious person."

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Jul 25, 2023Liked by Chad Orzel

This all seems right to me- saw it tonight. Some of the This Is A Biopic stuff in the first act was a little blah to me, but I don't mind a little fanservice (not least of which doors of LeConte Hall that I walked through as an undergrad...) The Trinity scene was pretty fantastic but they played the Bhagavad Gita bit pretty straight. The sons-of-bitches line was sorely missed. Anyway, I do wish I came away with some nugget of insight about Oppenheimer, and I didn't. I know a lot more about Lewis Strauss, though....

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I recall in the movie Oppenheimer that supposedly only one person proved Einstein wrong. But recently I was reading a book entitled “the beauty of falling” by Claudia de than and she retells the story of a physicist named Howard Percy Robertson who was at the time an anonymous “referee” at the journal physical review who rejected Einstein’s paper on gravitational waves and proved him wrong . Robertson eventually convinced Einstein of his mistake which saved Einstein of a potentially huge embarrassment. I know the film Oppenheimer was a movie not a documentary but leaving the story of Howard Percy Robertson out seems like a strange choice for Nolan.

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The scene in which Feynman is sat on a jeep playing drums isn't anachronistic, it's mentioned by Feynman at the 1h20 mark in his talk here: https://youtu.be/uY-u1qyRM5w?si=uc84xUosit5tTi6L

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(at 1:07:20 actually)

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Thanks for the physics updates (especially the Alvarez one -- seems like their should be lots of photo references for these guys). I mostly get what you are saying, there's not a super great 'big message' here, but I loved the performances and the look of it. I did find myself wondering if Oppenheimer's accent was accurate -- I haven't heard any recordings of him. (I did occasionally find the music to be almost too intrusive, although I'm wondering if that was just me as my musician/cinephile child thought the music was great.)

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I'm just looking forward to the spins offs. "David Bohm in exhile" "Teller's Moon” and “The Black Hole Debate” will be fun ;)

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I'll be sure to get back to this after I watch the movie.

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